Sweet

by Missy Bauman

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    Paterson Monday's beautiful artwork paired with Courtney Basler photography, this digipack will be best friends with the CD tray in your car!

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    Get all 4 Missy Bauman releases available on Bandcamp and save 35%.

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1.
Sorry 00:53
don't know what to do because everything feels bad know what to say cuz you never told me that i never want to make loving me hard i'm sorry. i'm sorry.
2.
H.I.M. 03:51
there's a well worn record with a title i forget i listen when he's on my mind and i'll admit he hasn't left one day i'll pick it up and that heavy dust will bring me to tears but for now i'll down a shot, sing forget-me-not, and wish he were here i don't deserve him. he's not like us he's pure and kind, never out of line, and his heart is full of love you don't deserve her, but you call it self-destruct but we're hurricanes, we can't help but break every heart that comes to us there's an old guitar case somewhere with a picture of your wife and a slow song from havana that came from another life but we were all of that at once, the highest tide of afterglow was it love, or drugs, or alcohol? i guess i'll never know i don't deserve him. he's not like us he's pure and kind, never out of line, and his heart is full of love you don't deserve her, but you call it self-destruct but we're hurricanes, we can't help but break every heart that comes to us that harmless indian medicine sure made a fucking mess of us
3.
Two Sisters 04:13
i think it was a tuesday that's what it felt like, anyway the day you tore my dress and you swore it'd be ok lying in the bathtub surrounded by my blood i was nine but i pretended it was love it's been a couple years, now. though i still remember somehow through all the times i've tried erasing you from my mind i didn't understand then no, i barely knew the concept but i bet you can guess that i'll never be the same i never know. is there another word for no that i just don't know my body is freezing and so you offer up your sheets i've been drinking and i tell you i'm only sixteen you said it wouldn't happen but now i'm drunk passed out on your bed if i had the strength, you know i would've fought back it's been a couple years, now. though i still remember somehow through all the times i've tried erasing you from my mind my friends didn't believe me well, i wish they could've seen me stumbling around in the street after you kicked me out that night i never know. is there another word for no that i just don't know i want to say your name now specific consonants and vowels but i can't bring myself to call you out they say it's one in three girls and i have two sisters
4.
all those little lies i tell you i guess they don't compare to you but you don't really care, do you? why would you? is loving me too much for you? you say that that's unfair to you the way that i just stare at you i love you. i love you. fire is still light. i feel it like a knife i feel my heart beat through the ground i pretend i'm sleeping when your "i love you" comes around you're my last glass of wine tonight i'm praying we get past tonight just promise me we'll be alright. why do we fight? why do we fight? fire is still light. i feel it like a knife why do we fight? why do we fight?
5.
No More Love 01:58
no more love. no more writing about you, no more songs. no more future i'm afraid of no more trust no more love no goodbye. no more laughs over wine, no heavy sigh no more wishing you would kiss me goodnight no more why no goodbye all my friends tried to say it'd end up this way but i just couldn't get it through my head people try to chalk it up to just the game well i played, i won, i lost, i threw your love away no more love. no more heartache when you're acting tough no more rose garden dreams of what we'll become not enough. no more love. not enough. no more love. no more love.
6.
Garter Belt 03:05
maybe i should clean my room find out where i'm hiding you in my top drawer with all my winter boots maybe i should call you back i bet you're wondering if i will ever take you back i'm wondering myself if i'll drown in blue well i ride my bike to forget you, but i know that winter's coming soon pull up your dress, i wanna see your garter belt like everything you hide sits right above your thigh pull up your hood, i wanna see you're someone else your voice it sounds the same, but there's nothing in your eyes maybe i should write you off. i'm dreading seeing you like dreading my clothes off your mismatched socks never bothered me but maybes just a word for don't i'm rejecting you before you're telling me you won't i build the walls and say i'm free well i ride my bike to forget you, but i know that winter's coming soon pull up your dress, i wanna see your garter belt like everything you hide sits right above your thigh pull up your hood, i wanna see you're someone else your voice it sounds the same, but there's nothing in your eyes
7.
Lana del Rey 02:30
i drew the brokenhearted girl i became. like lana del rey i am a pit, and good things fall in to never be seen or heard of again a legend, an obscurity, a horror scene, and me i drew blood. and a crooked black fox in ballpoint pen i drew you too but i am a pit. and good things fall in and given the chance, i'd pull you in too a legend, an obscurity, a horror scene, and me.
8.
i'll be better i'll stop calling you at midnight i'll stop stealing your sweaters i'll be bigger than i was and i'll be quiet but more mysterious than shy, and lovely. when you see me you will smile i'll be better. i'll start pressing wildflowers in a book i've bound together i'll be calmer than i was i'll be broken but in a way that makes me smarter, and careful when you see me you will know i'll be better i'll be strong enough to keep in touch i'll write you letters. i'll start going to the gym and i'll be lonely but in a way that's somehow beautiful and funny when you see me I will smile back
9.
a year later, a year after, do you have regret? i wait for these feelings to pass, but they haven't yet i'm missing home and i see our ghosts stumbling drunk and strange standing at the edge of our lives before they changed i said "we don't have to touch to know you is enough" but all our clothes came off in the end you don't know how to talk to me it's infinite everything and i'm glad it's happening this hotel room still reminds me of you so i'll smoke a cigarette i know i should quit you too, i just haven't yet i felt afraid and i swallowed my shame and you disappeared did i dream the whole thing? when i said "we don't have to touch to love you is enough" but all our clothes came off in the end you don't know how to talk to me it's infinite everything and i'm glad it's happening

credits

released August 7, 2020

music & lyrics by missy bauman
all tracks mastered by zach gerber at skytrack studios

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Missy Bauman Ontario

dreamy drug folk.

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